Sunday 2 June 2024

Still alive and ranting

 Old age is an insult. Anno Bloody Domini. It sabotages a mind of which you were once mildly proud. There you are, having a conversation, holding forth, when you realise that you have lost the thread. Not only the thread of your argument, you have lost names, the names of anything and anyone that once flowed from your lips without the least effort. You are flailing, waffling, using filler words, you find yourself becoming inarticulate and ignorant, and it bloody hurts. Paralysis of the brain occurs. Suffocation of the brain.

Not only does your body let you down, your mental acuity is a thing of the past. Physically and mentally you stumble, stub your toes, slow down until you resemble those old people for whom you felt sorry, who take up time and space that the young and active could utilise so much more efficiently. And you, you personally, were never going to be like them. Never. You would make damn sure of that.

Old age is an outrage. There is nothing wrong with protesting about the human condition but that's about all you can do. Just take it on the chin. Consider the alternative.

Maybe it's my long period of limited mobility and enforced partial solitude that has brought this on. I hope so.

See you soon.

22 comments:

  1. I'm glad to see you sharing this here, Friko, even though I'm terribly sorry you are having to deal with this. (And yes, we all will or are in one way or another). Your paragraph about resembling the people you felt sorry for and vowed never to be like rings so true, if not yet an actuality, a deep concern.

    Just remember, you have a community here and that while you may have partial solitude, here you have people who care about you. We can't bring you soup if you're laid up or pop by with a bottle of wine for a few hours of in-person conversation, but we're still here. For you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Keep ranting my friend. I do periodically and yes mobility, acuity, all gone by-by. I struggle too. I miss you when you don't write. Rant away, it's about all we've got some days. There's life in these old girls yet.
    XO
    WWW

    ReplyDelete
  3. the body decays, the mind decays. it's the natural order. we can fight it as much as we can...eat right, exercise, do things that stimulate the mind, take whatever meds to boost what needs boosting...but the end is inevitable for us all. best not to let it get us down and try to enjoy what we have left and can do. and until we get there be kinder and more understanding to those are are already there.

    ReplyDelete
  4. So very glad to find a post from you this morning! So glad to know that you ARE still with us. Do I ever hear what you are saying. Physically, I am still functioning ok, even though I am much more stooped and slow. Mentally is another story. Realizing that our minds no longer function as they once did is such a sad reality. Not only forgetting a word, or a name. It's so upsetting to be thinking about something, then, boom, the whole thread is gone. Somewhow, for me, it is even scarier when it happens within my own mind than when I am in conversation with someone. Thank goodness for the internet and friends who blog. Reading about the problems of others helps so much. You have been a favorite blogger ever since I discovered bloggers.
    From what you wrote here, your head still works! And still excels. Hope you are here often, now that you are back. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I second RunNRose‘s last paragraph, Friko. Being able to write what you did here means your mind is still capable of more than many.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good to hear from you, Friko... even though you don't seem happy. I think besides old age, being alone and not around others to share your thoughts and life is difficult and may hasten other aspects of old age. I don't know how you could make changes to alter this, but if possible, I think you should try. If not possible... ranting and sharing online is also good. We're here to listen.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm so glad to see you. Old age is a pain because of other people's attitudes, treating everyone as though they're deaf and blind and quite incapable of rational thought. Don't let the buggers get you down!

    ReplyDelete
  8. "...who take up time and space that the young and active could utilise so much more efficiently."

    Your time and space are for a purpose. No one can use it more efficiently. It is yours.

    ­čęÁ Glad to see you again, Friko.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh Friko. How absolutely terrifying and frustrating. Rant away. And judging by this post your mind is still sharp.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I second that thought from EC. I am dealing with encroaching blindness and hoping I can find a way to stay connected with my electronic friends. It's good to hear from you, dear friend.

    ReplyDelete
  11. "And you, you personally, were never going to be like them. Never. You would make damn sure of that." Yes, me too. Silly us! I'm delighted to see my friend under any circumstances. Thank you for sharing with us. Aloha!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I regularly stop by hoping you will post. Your post made the day although I am saddened to read you feel so. Persevere and I will too.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Middle-age is feeling like a cruel joke sometimes, too. Glad to see you 'round these parts, Friko! Liebe Gr├╝sse aus San Francisco!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh Friko - it's so good to hear from you ... and yes old age is challenging - it certainly sounds as though your wits are still with us ... lovely to read this raging, ranting comment in your traditional style. Keep going ... beat it and them ... cheers Hilary

    ReplyDelete
  15. Here in Florida, I have been checking every week and was so happy to see your published blog today. You are such an inspiration.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I was glad to see you pop up on my blog roll again. There are days when I could second your rant on aging. Like someone famous once said, "Youth is wasted on the young."

    ReplyDelete
  17. It's SO lovely to see a post from you again, Friko. Getting old is not for sissies, I've heard it said. And I must agree. Rage and rant as you will, we will be here to keep company with you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I am in complete agreement with you, Friko. How on earth did I get to be this old, why is my body not cooperating, why is my mind a blank sometimes? How fair is that?

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'm glad you are well enough to post again!

    ReplyDelete
  20. So glad to see a post from you. And I sure get it about being old and the things that leave us one way or another. Know that many of us here are in the same boat and can relate. A quote that rings true is… There's a point in which life stops giving you things and starts to take them away." Mary

    ReplyDelete
  21. So good to see you back. Many of us are in the same boat. We are here in mind and heart for you.

    "There's a point in which life stops giving you things and starts to take them away."
    Mary

    ReplyDelete
  22. Somehow my feed reader disappeared in some computer update or other, and it was only by seeing you in Ellen's blogroll that I realized you were posting. Now, I've reclaimed Feedly, and have you ensconced there. I'm so glad to see a post from you, although I do wish you at least a bit more sanguine. No matter; we take you as you are, and are glad of it!

    ReplyDelete

Comments are good, I like to know what you think of my posts. I know you'll keep it civil.