Sunday 31 August 2014

Stupidity squared

I really shouldn’t give this book free publicity. Rarely have I been more cross with myself for wasting hours and hours on a book. Another 700+pager but, oh dear me, what a lot of rubbish.

BookBub or a similar site were advertising the title as an Amazon ’special offer' ebook; as I’ve seen the author in the Guardian bestseller lists I thought I’d give him a go. Bestseller lists are by no means indicators of quality writing; I really must remember that for the future.

So there you are in a story about the intended rape and plunder of a pharaoh’s hitherto unknown tomb with the regulation sets of baddies and goodies. The goodies do all the work and the baddies reap the benefits. Once, twice, three times. The goodies (who aren’t really much better than the baddies because they also plan to smash and grab for themselves rather than a worthy cause) don’t seem to learn that the baddies are only a step behind them at every turn and merrily and enthusiastically dislodge a whole river and mountain to get at the treasure, trusting all and sundry on the way with their secret (secret? shifting a river and half a mountain?) undertaking. Scores of people are mown down irrespective of creed, colour, holiness, except, of course, our heroes and heroines (yes, two very beautiful women also figure prominently).

Naturally, the baddies die horribly, each separately and slowly and our heroes emerge victorious. Even more nauseating, the author inserts his name into the story as the famous chronicler of such derring-do throughout the book, just in case we forget who is serving up this delightful dish of tripe.

Why did I persevere?
 
a) because I am stupid and
b) I wanted to see the ending.

Although I skipped a lot of the book during the last third I was hoping he would surprise me and do what he did to the river: diverge into an untried channel. He didn’t, he stayed true to formula right to the bitter end.






37 comments:

  1. Sigh. Hours stolen which you will never get back.
    And yes to the best seller not equalling quality sadness.

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  2. Time your could have spent better, perhaps. But sometimes that's the way the [book] spine cracks

    ALOHA from Honolulu
    ComfortSpiral
    =^..^= . <3

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  3. Friko, I will stick with my comment to your prior post. You are a wise soman.

    When we next meet we can toss more of this wisdom stuff in the air...and I do do hope we will laugh a bit too.

    Now...I am going to return to my online viewing of the USOpen Tennis tornament. Our network tv has abandoned its coverae to other more profitiable bits. Football season is upon us. And Fricko. Our football is not soccer.

    Still think I owe you an email. xo

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  4. Oh, we have all spent time on bad books. I have hated many books where I still wanted to know what happens! Skipping to the end is fun. No time wasted then I go to Goodreads to give it a scathing review.

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  5. Well, I've just started using BookBub for its free or inexpensive suggestions. On the free ones, I start reading and if I think it's terrible, I stop after about 50 pages. Going a full 700 would be torture. Life's too short...

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  6. I tend to persevere. I've only put a very few books down before finishing. I slogged through Steven King's 'Gunslinger' only to be sorely pissed at the end. What a cop out.

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  7. On the positive side, I'm glad someone has shown the folly of moving mountains and diverting rivers for a bad idea. I have avoided doing so and wish other would.

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  8. Reading a book that we don't care for is torture, I agree. I read reviews first and usually don't bump into that situation, but recently I was given an ARC copy to review and I do NOT care for the book, which makes it hard to write a fair review.

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  9. heh. i got suckered on another book by this author...thanks for the reminder not to go there again...
    i guess i should say thanks for enduring...just to save us...smiles.

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  10. The Golfer read all Smith's earlier books then went off him for some reason. This particular one is part of a series about ancient Egypt - number 2 of 5. I take it you won't be rummaging around 2nd hand places looking for the others??
    Me - well I thoroughly enjoyed the FILTH series you recommended. I'm on the look out for more of Jane Gardam at the library
    Take care
    Cathy

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  11. Don't you just hate it when you stick with something -- a book, a movie, a play -- hoping against hope that it will get better -- and it doesn't? Lately, I've become much more jealous of my time and have started putting down books that don't engage me and have even left a movie early when it was terribly disappointing. I'm seeing it as a kind of self-care. It's hard to get into that mode, though, isn't it? You keep hoping....

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  12. I read several of Wilbur Smith's books years ago and found them quite good. Then a few years later his writing seemed to change and I couldn't read whatever book it was I'd picked up. Or perhaps I'd grown away from his style of story. Anyway I cleared all Wilbur Smith books off my shelf and I've never bought another.

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  13. Sounds like one or two movies I have watched when there was nothing else on or I didn't have control of the remote...

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  14. Hello,

    Oh dear, this sounds all so familiar......sticking with something that from the off was destined to be a literary disaster. Yes, we too have been there but we are getting better at jumping ship part way through! This is a lesson for life itself as well as reading books, we think.

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  15. Hi Friko - some authors don't seem to pick up their quill and get it right when they reincarnate - sounds a horrid outcome from a not too enjoyable read at all ... still it was wet last week - well it was down here ...

    Happy reading selection next ... cheers to a warmer week .. Hilary

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  16. I remember reading some Wilbur Smith many years ago, but not now. I've given up trying to finish books I don't like. Life is too short.

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  17. Like Terra, I read reviews and more than one. However; having said that, I have bought a book now and then anyway, just to say perhaps this will be a good read. I open the book, and settle down in my chair by the window with a nice cuppa and begin to read. I might pass the 1st chapter and think to myself that it will get better and it doesn't. I fight with myself to keep going, wanting to give the Author a chance to pick me up and delight me with his/her novel. Then, I can no longer stand it and throw it aside, drained and feeling empty for the time I spent trying to get the "drift" of the entire writing. I usually do not buy anything from that Author again. Like you, I have also learned that upon occasion, "Best Seller's" list isn't worth canary poo. Then there are Authors that write one great novel and that is it. Anyway dear Friko, I am usually off to another book at the flip of the page with my eReader or actual book. Have a wonderful day :)

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  18. Yes, this has happened to me way too often. And occasionally there will be one that has been raved about by people I trust, and I simply cannot understand why. So I persevere and usually wish I had followed my own intuition about it. Right now I've got three books sitting by my table and I haven't a clue if I'll enjoy them, but here goes. I'll skip the one you've already reviewed. :-)

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  19. It happens, Friko. Not that that is any comfort. The number of times I watch, say, Midsummer Murders (repeat) I will have to ask for a refund when next I present my time sheet and expenses. Still, as long as we have time to squander, we haven't run out of it.

    There are times, and I haven't done so yet because I revere the printed (how couldn't I considering the country we stem from and Buecherverbrennung) but will fling the odd one across the room. Which immediately makes me root for the author since it doesn't seem fair to him/her having spent ages penning the thing (and all assorted miseries like finding a publisher etc etc etc) to then be discarded by me. Or you. Or anyone. Fact is, and it's tough titty, just because something is on the page and you paid for it doesn't make it worth the reader's while.

    Am a little under the weather myself having dusted down my bookshelves over the weekend. OH MY GOD, Friko. Who knew what I harbour under my roof. Think garden, think weeding.

    U

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  20. I would have made it to page 10.

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  21. You and I have much in common, however, in recent years I have given myself permission to read the last page and chuck the book if it is a dud. You are correct. Best seller lists tell us nothing. I think two thirds of the peuchaers buy the book and never read past page 1. If you are 'into' Egyption archeology, you can do no worse that read the history of Carter and Lord Carnavon and King Tut.

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  22. Glad for the heads up!! Frustrating to lose that much time and effort on a disappointing book. (That's how I feel about over half the Stephen King books I have read--especially The Dark Tower series!!--LOL!).

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  23. Ouch! My husband and my sister-in-law both love Wilbur Smith's books. Perhaps you should try one of is Courtland (Courtney?) chronicles set in Kenya and South Africa?

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  24. My friend Lynette told me years ago that "everyone raving about a book" is reason enough not to read it, and I've come to believe her. And now here's your vote on the same side of the ticket.

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  25. Thanks for sparing us from reading the book. I've read a few like this for the same reasons you listed. I try not to do so at this stage in life.

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  26. I don't have enough time left on earth for most 700 page books, and I can guarantee you this one would have been on its way to the reseller lickety-split. Of course, most of what I read and all of what I buy is directly related to something I'm interested in, and I usually have a pretty good grip on what the book will be by the time it arrives.

    The library's my friend, for sure. If someone recommends and I can get a copy at the library, I'll dip into it that way. It's a great way to prevent frustration.

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  27. Well, you're not the first to read a book they don't like all the way to the end. I used to do that all the time, but like some others I've lost patience with age.

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  28. No , Wilbur Smith will never surprise ... or entertain .

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  29. Friko, I don't remember hearing of Wilbur Smith before now. Thank you for the warning!

    You are very right...best selling books are not guaranteed to literature worth reading. (My most recent discovery of evidence to this thought was The Goldfinch. I couldn't believe how overwritten it was. After managing about 60 pages of it, I just had to return it to the library.)

    xo

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  30. Being a best seller is definitely not correlated to quality. I draw a parallel to TV shows. The ones with the highest viewership are some of the worst ones! I tend to read reviews, they usually give an unbiased opinion :-)

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  31. Reading can be funny that way. Nine times out of ten, if it doesn't grab me (or it nauseates me) in the first chapter or two, I toss it aside and start another book. But every now and then, I masochistically do what you just did.. and persevere. And almost always regret it. I hope you enjoy the next book immensely.

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  32. i MUST now call at my library to see if they can get me a copy.

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  33. I know what you mean about staying to the end. I do that and I hate myself for it sometimes. Only once did I stop after the first 500 pages with 300 more to go and say "My time is worth more than this."

    Well, I for one, appreciate the publicity on this "great tome." For thanks to your solid review and heaps of praise I will NOT be adding it to my already too-long reading list!

    Hope all's well with you and that you are enjoying summer and Stratford. I've been offline a bit and just catching up. It's good to "see" you again!

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  34. Dear Friko, what a disappointment. And yet what is your tripe is another person's caviar. But I know what you mean about reading something that seems to lack probability and that is written poorly. When I pick up a book like that, I find myself always wanting to figuratively take out my pencil and edit and delete. Delete. Delete. But mostly what I do is simply give each book about ten pages and if in that amount of reading the author has captured me with a character or an event or an idea or some suspense, then I close the book and return it to the library! Thanks for letting us know about this "tripe"!!! Peace.

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  35. I think you've successfully talked me right out of this one.

    ;)

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