Thursday 2 January 2014

This Year, Everything Will Be Different,

                              I will be kinder, more patient, eat less, exercise more, read improving books, leave behind childish and frivolous things, help the aged and succour the young, always wash dishes after a meal and not wait until the next morning, sew on buttons the moment they come off and long before I need to hunt for a matching one in the button tin, and I will never ever give anyone cause to find me ‘scary’ again.

Sally and Frank walked Millie today; standing on the doorstep, Sally confided that after we had left yesterday’s party, another ‘friend’, in the course of a quick explanation about us behind our back (you know the sort of thing, a new acquaintance asks casually “who are these people” in the nicest possible way), this ‘friend’ - you note the inverted commas! - tells the new acquaintance a few pertinent facts about us, finishing off by saying: “Friko can be a bit SCARY sometimes”.

Scary? I am a PUSSYCAT, I’ll have you know.

So, for about two minutes, under the above heading,  I thought of becoming a brighter, sweeter, leaner, fitter, kinder me in 2014.

The problem is that it is 2014 now and I would therefore have to make a start instantly. Have you seen the weather? Have you seen how dark and gloomy it is and how persistent the rain lashes the windows? Have you heard the slates on the roof rattle in the wind ? The baubles are packed away for another year, the candles have been extinguished and the lingering smell of myrrh and frankincense is turning a bit rancid. Villagers are exhausted after the relentless festive jollities, although it helps that grandchildren have waved a fond farewell and are once more the sole responsibility of their parents. Hibernation seems an admirable plan to follow. Leavened by chocolates, schmaltzy TV, and a lot of reclining on sofas with a not-necessarily-improving book, and a sprinkle of self-indulgent outings now and then to ensure that life support systems remain functional.

If double-faced Janus, the Roman God who looks back to the old and forward to the new year, who gave this  long, dreary month its name, cannot make up his mind which way to march, who am I to decide for him?  By the time January is over, any pious resolve as to improvement of character will have got buried under the paving slabs of the road to hell, so why bother?

On second thoughts, no New Year’s Resolutions for me.




55 comments:

  1. nee daar heb je gelijk in niks voornemen maar gewoon doen.

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  2. None for me neither. Actually, Friko, I think you're OK just as you are and I don't like so called friends who slag you off behind your back either - we can both live without them.

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  3. Your first paragraph was truly frightening. I could see epic failure before I had begun.
    I am glad that you decided to leave these aspirations in the dust/mud/gutter. Where they belong. And really like your hibernation plans.

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  4. Scary? There are worse attributes. I take it that you are strong and not afraid to voice an opinion? Would you rather they said, she is nice but a little too timid and passive...a foolish child? We are what we are and we can try to build on our strengths and reduce our bad traits, but in the end we are still the same. Yet, it sounded as though they liked you and that is the important thing. Yes, resolutions are for the young.

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  5. There is nothing scary about following the beat of one's drummer, Friko, and you do this unfailingly. Let's lift that toast to simply living life authentically in the new year.

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  6. Well said, how I echo your sentiments! And scary? Well, once when we had roofers here putting on a new roof the lead roofer asked me whether I was a teacher or a nurse, because either way he was scared of me. Me? Just an old softie:) All the very best to you and yours for 2014.

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  7. ha. just be you...and if they dont like it...well....smiles.
    i really care little for what people think...
    smiles.

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  8. Scary? Whatever sort of sheltered life has this person led, one wonders.
    Heartily glad that you are not changing what makes you you.

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  9. Scary? Well, if being fiercely truthful is scary, I guess you are!

    Funny for such a scary person I find you one of the most endearing I have met in this blogging adventure!

    Have a happy and healthy 2014 Friko and ... "don't change a hair for me ... not if you care for me ..." :)

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  10. Scary? Maybe the speaker was referring to your wit, intellect, and your piercing insight into people's lives that all leave me laughing and sighing at the same time. Then there's your way with words. Scary can be good. I'm so glad you are not resolving to change.

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  11. Your last sentence is perfect.

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  12. A great post, Friko. I keep trying to improve, but keep backsliding. Ah well, 'twas ever thus, as my late father used to say ... Happy New Year, anyway! xoxo

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  13. You go girl!
    (..translates to being supportive in American. Sometimes accompanied by some sort of fist punching air movement:)

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  14. Somehow I wouldn't have used the word scary to discribe you. The pastor at church when I was a child scared the beejeebes out of me. Maybe iy's because you are a whole ocean away, but I wouldn't call you scary.

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  15. What's that old saying about being true to yourself? You can only be what you are - anything else is not the truth - Changing for changes sake does no good and sometimes breeds resentment - so stay as your are Friko and let the world see you as you are - not what others feel you should be.
    Happy New Year
    Cathy

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  16. Please don't spend your whole year reading improving books. Take a few hours when you feel charitable and read mine. Wishing you every good thing in 2014.

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  17. OH, I just LOVED your opening paragraph. I knew where you were headed, and good for doing just that! Pitch that crap right where it belongs. You are one of the most interesting people I know, and I hope you don't change! :-)

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  18. the one who told you this is "scary"
    I love and adore you just the way you are...do not change a thing
    especially the way you write........you put me right there

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  19. so, how many of those do you think you'll actually keep?

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  20. Exactly. Those sorts of resolutions will only bring you grief.

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  21. Join the club - I never make resolutions. I might make a change or two but only in my own good time. For now, pass the chocolates, I'm pouring the wine.

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  22. I'm with you -- no new year's resolutions, though I do have goals. A plan. I might not live up to it, but I'll give it a go for a few days.

    Heard England had its share of blustery, windy and wretched holiday weather, too. They say our high this weekend will be -2. That's without wind chill. I don't know how that translates to centigrade or if you mark windchill over there, but it's just too cold for words. Hibernation sounds rather grand! (Scary? Maybe you're different in person, but I think scary is pushing it a tad too far!)

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  23. Hold up and heal from all the enforced socializing, I say!

    ALOHA from Honolulu
    Comfort Spiral
    > < } } ( ° >

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  24. We could be twins, separated at birth! I would like to be kind, thrifty, organized, and drop dead gorgeous, but a resolution won't make a miricle! happy New Year.

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  25. Scary? HA!
    I will eschew resolutions too, embracing the TV remote, reclining chair (we have identical chairs, right to the colour) and a new novel and any leftover chocolate. The grandchildren leave on Saturday - how you know where you'll find me~

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  26. Well Friko, having had the great pleasure of actually spending some hours with you during that now gone over the horizon 2013, I found this post amusing. Isn't it funny how folks judge other folks. Isn't it funny how judging can become a bit more difficult if a person actually gets to know a person?

    I don't know if I am actually making any resolutions for 2014. I did make a 2103 resolution and kept it. It was sort of an easy resolution, but I did keep it. My 2014 contemplated resolution actually will involve more thinking and acting. Following through as "they" say.

    I'll keep that res to myself for now. I definitely look forward to seeing you again soon, and how that 2014 will give me that opportunity.

    xo

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  27. Hi Pussycat, leave that be! You are just right as you are! Period! :-)

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  28. I'm not scared of you–yet. I doubt if you'll ever give me a reason to be scared.

    Love,
    Janie

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  29. No New Year resolutions for me, either. I love my life the way it is now, and although there are always bits and bobs where one COULD improve oneself, I very often just don't see the point.

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  30. Don't think I have ever kept a New Year's resolution yet, so not much point in making them. Have a great 2014 and I wish you all the best for health as well. Diane

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  31. glad you came to your senses. that list seemed like a recipe for failure. especially the doing the dishes after the meal and not waiting til morning.

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  32. Hi Firko - I sort of think about resolutions but am never sure why as by the 2nd they're well and truly forgotten ... I'd quite like the weather to sort itself out - don't know if it does resolutions up in the Stratosphere! I am about to set out and visit Seaford ... just hope there's no trees down or anything as such ...

    Great post ... I'm wilting with the thought of workmen on Monday! Not funny really .. still needs must ... a good roast pork supper seems worth while going out for ... ?? at least I won't need to do the dishes!

    Cheers and Happy New Year .. Hilary

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  33. Awe, theres nothing wrong with being scary :). It just means your more interesting,

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  34. "Hibernation seems an admirable plan to follow..." I'm with you there!

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  35. Your posts never fail to amuse, educate, or fascinate - how do you do it? This one made me laugh out loud, a sound the cottage walls haven't heard for a day or two. Thanks, Friko :)

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  36. Good lord Friko I was most upset reading the Ist para. I come here for bonding not for alienation. But all was well by the end of the last p. Phew.

    XO
    WWW

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  37. Powerful, some find that inherently scary.

    "Leave behind childish and frivolous things"!?!? NO! Noooooooo…

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  38. "No New Years Resolutions"
    That's a very wise decision.

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  39. I think it says more about your 'friend' than it does about you, some people like to think they have a difficult friend, as it it makes them feel special to that person, In their other friends eyes.
    I have had the idea of not smoking anymore, then this morning I had a delivery ultra thin Rollie tips, enough to last a year, I cannot even remember ordering them, so while I was busy working up to doing something good for 2014, the other me obviously had other idea's.
    Keep warm, keep dry and keep going!

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  40. Hahahaha!! I actually think it's good to be a little bit scary sometimes! It keeps everyone on their toes ...

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  41. Bahahahaha… I love it! You are so eloquent!

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  42. Everything changes, whether you want it to or not. Even you, I imagine, despite what you think.

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  43. Yeah, I made the same resolutions. Mine listed about eight minutes and fifty-two seconds. How long did yours last? xoxox

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  44. Oh too bad, I was looking forward to you joining in the fun. Dianne

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  45. Never, never, change. I like you just the way you are.

    I may spend the rest of the evening catching up on all the posts you wrote while I was taking a blog break. I know I have missed out on a lot of great writing. Happy New Year.

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  46. I like your closing, as I find resolutions hollow/exhausting/ridiculous. If one wants to make a change, make it, says I.

    That noted, I do wish someone with resolve would move into my house and wash the dishes before bed each night and not in the morning.

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  47. It might be an idea , before you slide into this whole new mellowness thing , to check with Beloved and your friends . They might like you the way you are ....
    I know I do .

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  48. Stay just as you are... nothing wrong with being a little scary.

    I've enjoyed catching up on your holiday posts -- we too are breathing a sigh of relief as the festivities come to a close..

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  49. Well, yes, that is some serious weather, I concur. And not conducive to hopeful intentions for a better way of being. But hey! The crocuses and snowdrops will soon be here (I am sure that some of the bulbs must have survived the deluge). Hopefulness and renewal will seem much more viable when nature starts putting forth green shoots. January 1st is arbitrary, Spring ultimately happens without reference to our calendars. Personally I am allowing the snowdrops to convince me that small moves towards a Better Way are not only possible but quite an exciting prospect. No resolutions, just a constantly opening mind.

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  50. Hello Friko,
    thanks so much for writing a comment in my blog!
    Shall we write in German? It is not so easy for me
    to translate your English, but it is a good exercise.
    I love the picture of your header. I was several times
    in England, because we had friends living in Newton
    Abbot, so we went to the south of England all the time.
    But a friend of mine went to Wales two years ago
    and she was thrilled after her holidays there.
    You seem to be a great writer and so many people
    are of the same opinion as I can read in your comments.
    I know Jeanie for a long time now and I am happy that
    you found me on her blog.
    Ich würde mich freuen, wenn wir in Kontakt blieben.
    Wo bist Du geboren und aufgewachsen in Deutschland?
    Best wishes
    Iris

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  51. Scary? Friko, have you been scary?! :-)

    Resolve to carry on, my dear. That is the only resolution there is to make.

    Pearl

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  52. The only time I make resolutions if when I'm in a snit and looking for something safe to break!
    Loved this, Friko.

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  53. The best resolution I ever made was never to wear fleece on a Thursday. Ah looking down, I see I do have a fleece on but underneath I am glamorous. Resolving to do things you like seems the way to go for me.

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  54. Nor me, Friko. A positive challenge is enough for me, not all the exhausting and impossible attempts to change my nature or habits. Thank goodness the rain has stopped at last.

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  55. Well, some I have a feeling many like you just the way you are :) I know I do.

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Comments are good, I like to know what you think of my posts. I know you'll keep it civil.