How To Defuse Racism

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My son and daughter-in-law came for a visit. My d-i-l is a black woman, big and beautiful, with a larger-than-life personality to match. She is striking looking, always dresses well, often in dramatic black and white, somebody you notice.

No shrinking violet is my Dee.

The four of us went to the village pub for dinner. We lined up behind the row of barflies on their stools, trying to catch the barmaid’s eye so that we could order drinks and she could direct us to our pre-booked table in the restaurant.

The first I knew that something unusual was going on was when I saw Dee being encircled by the arm of a rather fat man sitting at the bar and heard gales of laughter coming from his companions and the man himself. Dee too was grinning all over her face.

Could she have come across an old friend here at Valley’s End? Surely not.

What happened was as follows:

Dee walked in on, and quite by accident came to stand behind, the fat man, who had his back to the room, as he was telling his companions a story about a big black woman. The others had noticed Dee come in and were grimacing at him to stop.

As she heard what he was saying, Dee put both hands on the man’s shoulders from behind, leaning in close, and said, loudly, with the full force of her personality, “like me, you mean?”, smiling disarmingly.

The chap turned sharply, saw what he had done, grinned back and paid her an extravagant compliment, asking what was a beautiful black lady like her doing in Valley’s End and offering his services, on the spot, to show her the sights.

Later, as we were sitting in the window of the restaurant, he walked by outside, knocked on the window and waved. Dee waved back.

Her quick-thinking action had turned what could have been an ugly and embarrassing incident into an amusing one. I am sure she has had occasion to do so before; perhaps the fat man will not be quite so free with his opinions in future.