tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post4208532682860062819..comments2024-03-27T16:19:53.023+00:00Comments on Friko's World: Afterwards Part 3Frikohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04277167831642088694noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-25401993104827041702017-09-24T08:25:51.326+01:002017-09-24T08:25:51.326+01:00Just stopping by to give you a hug, friend Friko ....Just stopping by to give you a hug, friend Friko ... Love, cat.^.^https://www.blogger.com/profile/17422876955246850636noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-15293466376152466992017-09-24T05:20:59.053+01:002017-09-24T05:20:59.053+01:00I nearly cried when I read of the chair, and of yo...I nearly cried when I read of the chair, and of you wearing his clothing. It all makes perfect sense to me. There is a comfort to such changes that we never can quite understand. I think of you in that green leather chair getting on with life the best way you can, and you are getting on with it, and I know that Beloved would be so pleased.<br /><br />Guilt. Yes, that is part of the process. Sally Wesselyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06470453773515491625noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-30089846948541046562017-09-17T14:43:02.912+01:002017-09-17T14:43:02.912+01:00This is insightful. Grieving takes so many forms ...This is insightful. Grieving takes so many forms in both little and big ways. Things become more important because of the routine attached and the person who cared for them. Makes me wonder what I will do when my time comes.Taborhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15257045780724471840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-33846593175743112992017-09-14T06:05:11.048+01:002017-09-14T06:05:11.048+01:00I hope it works well for you.I hope it works well for you.Ur-spohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04237644452200889946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-69970775934109283662017-09-11T20:18:52.206+01:002017-09-11T20:18:52.206+01:00Oh, I love your account and yes, so familiar. I sa...Oh, I love your account and yes, so familiar. I sat on my Mom's kitchen table, drank her coffee and smoked her cigarettes, having given up smoking over 3 decades ago. Japanese Mom wore her daughter's, my friend's dresses. I kept the oddest little trinkets from my Mom's household, such as her paring knives, familiar to me from childhood, her purple plastic clothes pins, and ancientsuenosdeuomihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01674675232587257034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-8991643617875708792017-09-11T03:53:16.063+01:002017-09-11T03:53:16.063+01:00I don't comment often but I get you in my emai...I don't comment often but I get you in my emails and I've always enjoyed your perspective and writing. You are very endearing and thank you for sharing your journey - Margarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00007201357693227614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-68990805931039100252017-09-11T00:31:29.916+01:002017-09-11T00:31:29.916+01:00In my humble opinion I think that guilt is a very ...In my humble opinion I think that guilt is a very natural part of the grieving process. And everything that you do. Do it. It is yours. Your way to cope and stay alive. You don't need anybody's permission for that.<br />I have a feeling that I would do very similar things.Carola Bartzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05536486322412234854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-71409532619349519032017-09-10T23:20:45.678+01:002017-09-10T23:20:45.678+01:00Grief doesn't come with a handbook. If someth...Grief doesn't come with a handbook. If something comforts you do it! :)Far Side of Fiftyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07995757632158408442noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-27758427079312070042017-09-10T22:07:21.678+01:002017-09-10T22:07:21.678+01:00I haven't been online for a while and am so so...I haven't been online for a while and am so sorry to hear of your beloved husband's passing. I think everything you mentioned here seems perfectly natural for one who is mourning her life's companion. Sending prayers and hoping you will continue to be comforted as you adjust to a whole new phase of life. Susan Andersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16049586085703324088noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-13071436298529006232017-09-09T20:20:33.881+01:002017-09-09T20:20:33.881+01:00I understand all of this
it keeps you close to him...I understand all of this<br />it keeps you close to him<br />Different but have done the same with something special from a loved one,<br />a small pin pin cushion, all I have of her and she was my favorite above all with<br />teenage parents. My mother's handmade quilts, I sleep under on that in the corner<br />she sewed "love mama'.<br />So keep everything you can that keeps him My Journey To Mindfulnesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15743386000772274656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-63946457180133702942017-09-09T14:56:04.471+01:002017-09-09T14:56:04.471+01:00yes, guilt is part of the grieving process and of ...yes, guilt is part of the grieving process and of course you do the things that help keep him close. as to living on and living well, well, these bodies continue to function, the mind continues to function even if we think they should not do so. life.ellen abbotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00535475792150335186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-72322250439145150162017-09-07T16:21:29.412+01:002017-09-07T16:21:29.412+01:00Makes perfect sense . You're allowed to do wha...Makes perfect sense . You're allowed to do whatever you want . SmitoniusAndSonatahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11210817141287881808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-62120604727406801032017-09-07T03:21:06.790+01:002017-09-07T03:21:06.790+01:00The things in our lives -- the chair, the knife --...The things in our lives -- the chair, the knife -- are important precisely because they do bear within themselves memories of places and people we have loved. I bring a rock home from a cliff, and place it on my desk. I touch it, I turn it over, and remember being in that place, at that time. In the same way, I use the silver from my parents' table now. Why should I, alone at a dinner table shoreacreshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16284698314697628805noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-49923614691807166362017-09-06T16:48:35.878+01:002017-09-06T16:48:35.878+01:00Everything you write makes all the sense in the wo...Everything you write makes all the sense in the world. It's all part of the grieving process, part of the learning to be without someone who was part of your world. The guilt? You bet. The guilt of "what could I have done" and the "what didn't I do that I should have." (Hate should.) And the chair, the anorak -- Oh, I have things in my house that are dreadfully wrong Jeaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17482528482559445943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-26027708128953862832017-09-06T07:44:10.237+01:002017-09-06T07:44:10.237+01:00I hope to have many more years ahead. Hopefully, y...I hope to have many more years ahead. Hopefully, you can enjoy life again, too.<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://horror-movienew.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">ดูหนังผี</a><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16241817112636794365noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-71633105512249362962017-09-06T00:08:53.118+01:002017-09-06T00:08:53.118+01:00The word that comes to mind is comforting. I imagi...The word that comes to mind is comforting. I imagine that it also brings a sense of closeness, almost like he is still there, and that is a good thing. Take care Friko. My thoughts are with you.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-34539069693410843462017-09-05T17:59:07.840+01:002017-09-05T17:59:07.840+01:00I think all of those things are absolutely lovely!...I think all of those things are absolutely lovely! Each brings comfort and solace. They are perfect things to do. :)Ritahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02043285884495492598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-55159376790520099922017-09-05T16:31:56.668+01:002017-09-05T16:31:56.668+01:00You are doing what will add a bit of comfort as yo...You are doing what will add a bit of comfort as your loss was huge. The green chair allows you naps to keep moving forward in your life. Yes his presence was there and now his spirit will be. There is a connection but no need to let guilt bother you. All is as it should be now. Thanks for sharing your toughest moments. Sending positive vibes.Heidrun Khokhar, KleinsteMottehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16174142810114806410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-394865101793796262017-09-05T14:02:35.079+01:002017-09-05T14:02:35.079+01:00I remember my mom doing similar things after my fa...I remember my mom doing similar things after my father passed on; adapting, keeping things I thought she would get rid of, holding on. She kept his wallet. I have it now, along with hers. I hope your Beloved's things give you a measure, no matter how small, of peace. Good thoughts coming your way. Penny O'Neillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14665025558373015362noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-6983630798555572872017-09-05T13:38:35.338+01:002017-09-05T13:38:35.338+01:00You are finding comfort in your Beloved's thin...You are finding comfort in your Beloved's things and habits and that is a good thing.Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06032033918798053005noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-47648782385423794132017-09-05T09:38:12.570+01:002017-09-05T09:38:12.570+01:00I hope you're finding comfort in his chair, us...I hope you're finding comfort in his chair, using his paring knife & eating banana with your muesli. x glgBeahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07886227825064266814noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-35588798543460900432017-09-05T08:07:39.484+01:002017-09-05T08:07:39.484+01:00Dear Friko - it's lovely to read of his traits...Dear Friko - it's lovely to read of his traits that you are adopting ... makes sense and yes you can thoughtfully converse with him as these early days go along ... and you will continue to do so. Be peaceful doing what you can, when you can, remembering things and taking them over as yours ... I can understand you not wanting to go through the processes of the why etc ... it's easier toHilary Melton-Butcherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17596532480645510678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-34928417314443660252017-09-05T07:47:34.220+01:002017-09-05T07:47:34.220+01:00Guilt part of the grieving process? Absolutely! Im...Guilt part of the grieving process? Absolutely! Imagine how guilty I have often felt for not being there when Steve fell dead to the floor in our living room that Thursday afternoon in November nearly 8 years ago, while I was at work, talking to customers and colleauges, reading and writing emails which became absolutely meaningless a few hours later.<br />The doctor told me I couldn't have Librarianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05704656564078750607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-83571967967767437512017-09-05T03:54:37.380+01:002017-09-05T03:54:37.380+01:00I am going through much of what you describe, thou...I am going through much of what you describe, though we each grieve in our own way. I smiled when I read you have adopted his anorak and chair, as I have adopted my husband's soft hat with the brim, perfect for walks. My dear husband told me he would die first, even though I am two years older, just as your husband said.Terra https://www.blogger.com/profile/04396481049075747940noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1294026230680025155.post-48566864510788457772017-09-05T00:41:53.316+01:002017-09-05T00:41:53.316+01:00All of what you are doing and describing is part o...All of what you are doing and describing is part of grieving and mourning, including wondering why you are still here...Hugs from afar.ehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11376645220662546020noreply@blogger.com