Thursday 27 March 2014

Unconscious Coupling

I looked at the everlasting calendar this morning to find the exact date for a friend’s birthday, mainly to see if there was time to send a card or if it would have to be an email.

“It is March, isn’t it? Goodness, 27th already.”

A vague thought entered my head: isn’t there some special date in March?

“Beloved, we forgot our anniversary.”

O dear, so we have. I do apologize. I remember mentioning it earlier this month, but then it totally slipped my mind.”

“Don’t worry dear, I forgot too.”

For the first time in 27 years of marriage we both forgot our anniversary. No matter, we shall have a slightly belated celebration.

Contrary to Paltrow and Martin and their ‘conscious uncoupling’ - ( have you ever heard a more pretentious way of announcing a divorce? Are they a train?) - we shall stay together.

Actually, I blame having two gardeners for our absentmindedness: it is totally confusing to have them turn up on two separate days of the week, stay for three hours and disappear again. It means that I have to be around, ready to work alongside them, make tea and conversation, answer questions and make suggestions, listen to gossip, give instructions and have them gently ignored in favour of each gardener’s ‘better idea’ and make sure their dates never clash, twice a week.

One of these days I’ll have to come clean, if only for the sake of my marriage.





45 comments:

  1. Mine always sneaks up on me and if it weren't for husband remembering it would sail right on past without notice from me.

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  2. HA! I thought of a train, too, when I heard "conscious uncoupling." Love the play on words. Happy Anniversary!

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  3. I laughed out loud at your description of the odd separation of the fancy celebrities. A train. I must remember that and would post it on FB if it were mine! I never remember dates, but I posted on that...what a boring post.

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  4. I love blaming the gardener(s). I'll have to use that the next time I forget an important date! BTW, did you get my e-mail. We're coming "sort of" near you this summer . . .

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  5. I would love to have two gardeners to have a cup of tea with and sit around to talk about flowers and trees. However, like lovers, you wouldn't want them to meet. Oh, the intrigue.

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  6. Better you both forget your anniversary than just one!

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  7. Happy Anniversary!


    ALOHA from Honolulu
    ComfortSpiral

    =^..^= <3

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  8. A very Happy Anniversary to you and your Beloved! I wish you all many more years of daily celebrations.

    (And I totally agree with your very amusing comment on the de-coupling.)

    xo

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  9. Happy belated and forgotten anniversary. I think it's a wonderful sign of two people who love each other and don't need anniversaries to remind themselves. :-)

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  10. Ooh err - not a card person in this household - not even sure of the date me and my handsome one got married - probably nearing the end of June/July...do know we have been married for >forty years as the years of my eldest son would account...
    But we love each other and this is important and not cards or anniversaries. - so don't worry Friko- love is forever and doesn't require a mark date.
    Anna :o]

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  11. You're unflappable, which maybe is why you've stayed together for 27 years ... happy anniversary, remembered or not!

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  12. ha. happy anniversary...
    and hey when every day is a blessing
    you can forget those days...smiles.

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  13. First of all, happy belated anniversary! I think the fact that you are so comfortable together that it can slide by with no apprehension or worry says much for the beauty of your relationship!

    And what IS this conscious uncoupling, anyway? I've never heard anything so pretentious in my life.

    But I fear that your affair with two gardeners is sure to come to light in your small village. People do talk -- including gardeners! I fear the day you come clean... it might not be pretty!

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  14. We both forgot our anniversary last year. In fact, neither of us is entirely sure of the exact date in July.We have to look at the framed marriage announcement on our wall.

    Happy anniversary!

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  15. Conscious uncoupling? What a pair of merchant bankers.
    And more importantly, happy belated anniversary - and Red is right, so long as both of you forgot it isn't a problem.

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  16. Happy anniversary! I think one is far happier when one doesn't remember dates. You're obviously living in the moment and with 2 gardeners I don't blame you one bit.

    XO
    WWW

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  17. I forgot our 21st anniversary years ago and even though we have now been divorced for twenty years I still feel awful about it.

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  18. I admire your ability to accommodate three men in your life, Friko.

    Having lived together with my wife, daughter and mother-in-law on several occasions, I sometimes think that three is three too many.

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  19. Happy Anniversary (belated) - we actually remembered ours last week (20th March - the 15th year this time, crystal, I think) I usually remember in time to book a table at our favourite restaurant. Oh dear - your 'affaires' with the 2 gardeners could get rather messy, I fear. I suspect the older one might take major offence, and I agree with Jeanie that in a small-ish, close community like yours things seldom stay hidden for long! Good luck!!

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  20. Bleated anniversary wishes! There are many plus and minus in the married life. Adjusting all things and making the life a wonderful one is a great achievement in marriage life!

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  21. Hi Friko - at least you and beloved have been together enough years for happiness to still abound. Yes that Paltrow-Martin thingy will start a trend .. or two ... or three ...

    Good luck with keeping the two gardeners apart ... but I'd be worried what I'd said to one and then forget which one I'd said what to ...

    Enjoy the dinner, or pub lunch .. or quiet walk with Millie in celebratory fashion .. Cheers Hilary

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  22. Your header made me smile. I think our Gwyneth has introduced a new phrase to the English language! I forget our anniversary too, but I never did care much about anniversaries.

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  23. This post made me laugh. You have such a good sense of humour - I had to giggle at the header. Have a wonderful dinner and walk with wonderful hubby.

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  24. Well at least you both forgot it, rather than just one. Makes it hard to get mad at the other person that way :)

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  25. Neither of us can remember the day of the month...and the year is somewhat haphazard too....but at least we haven't hit the buffers yet....

    Three men in your life...and I think I have problems with one man and a sheep!

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  26. Ha! A train or train wreck I think.
    Well, Friko, the good thing is that you both forgot at the same time. We, haven't forgotten, yet - but have had a laugh over giving each the same card.
    With two gardeners you are keeping and a husband, well, I would have come clean long ago - accidentally, of course,forgetting who is who, when, and what fore!

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  27. Uncouple and coparent! Consciously! WOW! And they love each other so much! Sorry, I am being sarcastic - I am sure you noticed! :-)
    Oh, and we keep forgetting each and every year - for more than thirty now, that's perfectly fine.
    And as long as you are calling your husband "Beloved" - neither he nor you have anything to worry! Happy weekend Friko.

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  28. Happy Anniversary - so glad you both finally remembered and have a lovely meal out or celebration

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  29. You've made me laugh -- we almost always forget -- or almost forget our anniversary! No uncoupling -- conscious or unconscious for us, I expect! Happy Belated Anniversary -- enjoy your celebration whenever you have it!

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  30. Hallo Friko,
    das ist mir glücklicherweise noch nicht passiert, obschon wir unseren Hochzeitstag nie besonders feiern. Nächstes ist übrigens unser 25 jähriges Ehejubiläum.

    Gruß Dieter

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  31. Ah Friko, I'm waiting with excited anticipation for the day when you come clean with 'the gardeners'. What a post it shall be!
    27 years, congratulations that's wonderful.

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  32. I forgot something last fall. I think it was David's birthday. Congratulations...27 years! Wow!

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  33. Always blame the weather and the eastern wind. Works for me.

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  34. Awww it happens. Belated Happy Anniversary to the two of you. Wishing you many, many more.

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  35. I laughed when I heard that phrase, too. Good grief. I liked yours much better, BTW! I keep wondering when the duel gardener thing is going to come to a head. Happy belated anniversary!! :)

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  36. Having two gardeners give you even more material for your blog. You might want to consider that before you "come clean."

    I'd not heard of the conscious uncoupling. True, it does make you think of a train. Congratulations to you and your dearly beloved on reaching this milestone.

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  37. I had to chuckle about the distraction of managing your gardeners - I hope you have a good delayed celebration with your Beloved.

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  38. So, you are two timing your gardeners, and you have 27 years on the clock with tour beloved, you are not doing to badly are you! If there is any uncoupling to be done, it had better be the gardeners, and just try to stay conscious with beloved.
    I always preferred coupling when unconscious, but then I have been married and divorced, probably where I was going wrong!

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  39. Conscious uncoupling... when I read that in the paper - I think it was only this morning - I thought "was für'n Blödsinn". A divorce is a divorce is a divorce... and that's my two cents to celebrity talk that I am usually not interested in at all.

    I love that you blame the two gardeners for forgetting your wedding anniversary. Just make sure you don't "unconsciously couple" them...

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  40. Congrats, Friko! Happy anniversary, you both are wonderful caring couple, well understandable each other.

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  41. Conscious uncoupling. I'm afraid that gives me an unpleasant visual of him puling out.

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  42. We've only forgotten our anniversary a couple of times.....it's nice to be doing something together after all these years......

    The article said Coldplay are recording their SIXTH studio album.....? Should see an increase in razor blades on it's release, too.

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  43. The sign of a great marriage, that no feelings were hurt, and that I bet you laughed about it instead!

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  44. Hilarious. And Happy Anniversary!

    =)

    PS. At least you have avoided conscious uncoupling these many years… ;)

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  45. Belated happy anniversary. I usually remember ours but DH is terrible about dates, even including his own birthday. i don't ake it personally. :-)

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