Monday 10 January 2011

BLOGGING - Anonymously ?

Quite recently it has become known to some here at Valley’s End that I am a blogger. It’s my own fault, I foolishly let the cat out of the bag myself to the local news and information journal who published some of my reminiscences and they are wanting a few more.

Then there’s family. Apart from Beloved very few knew; neither did local friends. Those few who knew didn’t care and rarely read, so I was quite safe.

All this may be about to change; it’s amazing how these things spread; one person knows – all know. I don’t care how many people in cyberspace read my blogs, the more the merrier; but once your cover is blown amongst your nearest and not so dearest, you need to watch your step.

I very rarely write about family – they might not like it; besides, we aren’t close enough for them to be in the forefront of my daily thoughts. (Let me reassure all of you who have just gasped in horror at my callous words: it would be different if anything catastrophic happened to any of them).

The past is different, you can’t hurt the feelings of the dead.

I have written about Valley’s End, of course, and will continue to do so; although I never mention real names, I sincerely hope nobody recognizes themselves. I am also hoping that it is true what they say, that a character in a book, a biography, or even a blog, never sees themselves as others see them. And if they do, they usually see themselves as the person who is described favourably, sympathetically, never as the unpleasant character, or worse, the butt of everybody’s jokes.

I believe that an ordinary blog post, depending on reading time, has a shelf life of about, say, five minutes? Maybe less. One reads, one digests, one comments, one moves on. In time, one gets to know more about one’s favourite fellow bloggers, you might even correspond outside blogland; you get to like people with whom you have something in common. A steady drip feed about personal stuff begins to make an impression.

There’s problem number one: your blogging pals know stuff about the people you mention in your blog.

Problem number two is when those whom you mention in your blog, however obliquely, feel that you are discussing private matters which are nobody’s business.

Problem number three is when it’s family you talk about and you are not one hundred percent complimentary. Family might just resent you talking about them, full stop.

So what to do?

I know several bloggers who blogged under their own names, who had to close blogs and start new, anonymous, ones because family members objected to what they had written; family members felt their privacy had been invaded. I can understand that, I too would like to choose what is known about me and my life.

There are many of you who revel in reporting on family matters, usually because family life is so idyllic that you simply have to share it. I love some of these blogs, they give me an idea of what I’m missing. You are allowing me to stand at a window looking in on a fairy tale. “Mrs. Cynic Saboteur” that I am – a phrase coined for me by a dear friend and confidante – doesn’t quite believe in the fairy tale, of course; nobody’s life is perfect all the time. No children are permanently sweetness and light, no husbands, wives, siblings never overstep boundaries.

Those bits mercifully remain hidden from view, which is only right and proper.

I don’t know how many of you who write about work, the office, colleagues, school, etc., or friends and social contacts, are known as bloggers; most of the ones I read, with pleasure, appear to be anonymous. If you are unfailingly kind and deeply understanding as well as unobservant about your fellow man and woman, I probably give up reading your blog. Not that that need worry you, of course, we all do what we like doing best.

There is one group for whom it seems not to matter if anyone knows who they are: the dreamers, poets, artists, writers of prose rather than personal blog posts, who never put a foot wrong. If you have nobody who resents you, nobody who actively wants you to stop blogging because they fear an indiscretion, well, you have only yourselves to blame.

Finally, it gives me great pleasure to be a member of this wonderful community for as long as you’ll have me; I love you all. (well, most of you).

48 comments:

  1. friko i was at a party recently where my blog became the topic of conversation. actually not so much conversation as discussion. "too cerebral", (no seriously!),"too lovely", hey here's some material like yours maybe i'll start a blog up (person displays a book of cheesy self-help mantras). i laughed with each comment as they were poking fun at me - i'm not sure why - but they needed to so i let them have their time. apparently they visit each day. i choose not to discuss the surface details of my life because they offer no possibility of movement or growth for me or anyone else where insights into the deeper machinations of this world might. thanks for this thoughtful posting friko!!! steven

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  2. Friko - A while back some Real Life friends (and family) became aware that I blogged. I mostly write about abstract events or people who have "moved-on" - I hope I don't offend but if in the end I do - well it's only my opinion. One of my sisters remonstrated with me that I was much too gentle about one long-dead relative but it was just that I had a different opinion of him to hers - he was always much kindier to me apparently. I would hate for you not to continue writing as openly and honestly as you do!

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  3. über all diese Dinge habe ich mir auch schon meine Gedanken gemacht... und, obschon ich niemals etwas über jemanden verraten würde, das zu sehr ins Persönliche gehen würde (das liegt einfach in meinem Charakter), hoffe ich doch, dass niemand, den ich persönlich kenne, mein Blog lesen wird (auch dies liegt in meinem Charakter). Ausser einem Freund, der selbst ein Blog führt, und der mir geholfen hat, meine Seite zusammenzustellen, weiss niemand über mein Schreiben. Aber davon abgesehen, gibt es wohl kaum jemanden unter meinen Bekannten, der überhaupt weiss, was ein Blog ist... Eigenartig nicht, man veröffentlicht etwas, das die ganze Welt lesen kann und möchte doch in gewisser Hinsicht privat sein?!...Auf alle Fälle geht es mir so. Ja, wirklich eigenartig...!
    Ganz liebe Grüsse an Dich und dass Du nur niemals (!) mit dem Bloggen aufhörst!!!
    Renée

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  4. and I love you. Because I am a rather simple optimistic person, I tend to write about the good and funny stuff. I don't write about the painful stuff, but I'm aware I would be a better writer if I did. I hadn't thought about writing anonymously since I'm such an open book.

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  5. Dear Friko I love you dearly. You say, so many things I would love to say. You know the story of why I changed my blog address. Now that one person that caused that change is being posted on other folks face books and her kids are putting their own pictures up on theirs. You can't escape the social networks. So I am just gonna keep on doing what I am doing and one of those things is to read your blog. WooHoo
    QMM

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  6. You raise an interesting point, Friko. Your honesty and talent as a wordsmith has come to the fore, yet again. Don't change, for anything.

    The most surprising reaction I've had from a family member was, 'Why?' and 'What do you hope to get from it?' Hmmm..

    I've gone on record as being a big fan of blogging, but I know where to draw the line with regards to what I write about family and friends. I would never set out to hurt or insult anyone, in conversation. Why should it be any different on my blog.

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  7. Myself, I feel I'm pretty honest and open with my thoughts and feelings, what I like and dislike, my ups and downs etc. I do feel people can actually get to know me through my blog. But when it comes to personal - I will reveal up to a certain extent, but not where it may infringe negatively on friends, family neighbours.

    Everything in life comes edited to a greater or lesser extent.

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  8. I think when it comes to blogging you have to be really careful about involving others, family or friends. I was stung a few years ago when I wrote about my daughter's school and they threatened me with legal action. I decided never to write about the school again and never have. I couldn't write an anonymous blog now because I lay myself open and people do get to know you.

    CJ xx

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  9. This is an interesting topic. None of my family - aprt from hubs - knows I blog. I have mentioned the blog to a few other non-relatives as well. I try not to include incriminating evidence in my blogs and even the work-based ones as heavily disguised. I have discussed my father (dead for many years) now and then but my family generally aren't sufficiently odd/funny/interesting to blog about anyway. Nevertheless, I prefer to be anonynous - just in case.

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  10. I feel much like Robert on this issue, Friko. On the whole, I feel that I express myself more freely and more candidly in my blog than I do in other social encounters. As Robert notes, however, we all edit our thoughts at some point. Where the line is drawn, of course, is for each individual to decide. My rule of thumb, however, is this: I assume that everything I write will be read by everyone I care about. If I would be uncomfortable defending a thought or position, I don't publish it. An interesting post, Friko, one that raises issues for everyone who blogs.

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  11. Oh dear Friko - I love you too - cynicism and all! If you ever decide to go 'anonymous', please e-mail me on where/how to find you. Life now would not feel quite right without a frequent dose of Friko!

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  12. I can relate to the questions and doubts you address here. I blog 'anonymously' although I have let the blue elephantine mask slip a bit. Also, I did not tell anyone I know about my blog until I had been at it for a few months and, one year later, there are still many people close to me who do not know. I have mainly told Spanish-speaking friends who do not really read or understant English all that well. Since they are kind and generous and love me, they give me the benefit of the doubt and assume the blog is beautifully written. Lest I hear otherwise from my English speaking friends, I have not told many about it. So, I had the advantage of writing for stangers, with the freedom this entails.

    The unexpected surprise, however, was how close I suddenly became with those 'strangers', so the idea of anonymity became to ring a bit shrill and hollow. I have still not decided quite how to deal with these questions or where I will take my blog identity in the future. The ideal would probably be to have two blogs, but who has time for that?

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  13. Since I consider myself an optimistic cynic, I too don't believe that things are all roses and pretty all of the time so when I read posts that are consistantly so I am skeptical or is it that me and my disordered life just don't fit in with that? :)

    I don't write about a lot of things or issues I am dealing with because of extended family that read my blog on occasion...I have often thought of starting an anonymous blog just to write about these unpretty things but when I can barely keep the one I have going, how the hell would I keep up another one. :)

    I have been enjoying reading your blog and getting to know you through your words so I hope you don't stop writing. Happy Monday.

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  14. Apart from my husband, friends and family are largely unaware of my blog, and I like it that way. In a time when one is likely to be on unknown Facebook pages, tagged and perhaps unaware, a blog seems rather tame.
    I like to write about the small things in my life. In general my life is over-busy. I work with damaged, angry and sometimes evil people. The blog gives me a chance to explore the sweeter things in my life or even the small difficulties and challenges that pale in comparison to what I deal with in the everyday at work. I'm not original enough to consider it a creative outlet, but it is an outlet of sorts. There's no writing here that will win a prize, but I find it satisfying.

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  15. When I started my blog I sent out a notice to all my friends and family. I don't think any of them read it. Or didn't. None of my friends do but I know now that some of my family does. But since my blog is about my life, the good parts of me and the not so good parts of me and my opinions of everything that I encounter, well, if they don't like it, too bad. I don't say anything I wouldn't say to their faces. but that's me, open to a fault. I've never had any complaints from friends or family. Mostly I don't use names. My brother sent me an email once after I posted about life growing up with our parents that he remembers things differently (he wasn't upset). Well, that's fine. Let him start his own blog. that's basically how I feel about blogging. Don't like it? Don't read it or start your own.

    I do hope you don't change what and how you write to appease someone who got their feelings hurt or just plain don't like the idea of being in someone's blog. I've never known you to be hurtful or hateful.

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  16. Haha, I like your thoughts, and you, Friko! Be the cynic you are, that suits me well. Like Lorenzo, I decided to write in English so my neighbours won`t be able to read my blog. I have some critical thoughts about them, although I try to just accept them. "Be kind to your enemies, nothing annoys them so", is what Oscar Wilde said. On the whole, my blog is about the good things in life, though. If I describe how I WANT it to be, maybe it will listen? My personal differences with family (which, you are right, we all have), cannot be solved in a blog anyway.

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  17. You raise some interesting points, Friko. I've fallen into the camp of being surprised when family don't read the blog, then been a bit put out when close friends have given me the benefit of their advice or negative opinion. I guess I have to be grown up about it and accept the good and the bad opinions from people close to me. Blogging is indeed a strange business: we can choose how much of ourselves we reveal, or we can hold back; however, there are times when we get it wrong and let the bathwater out with the baby. I have to confess that when I am having a bad day I tend not to blog about it. Though the odd time I've shared something sad, readers' comments have cheered me up. As far as you're concerned, keep up your high standard, your blog has an edge which helps to keep us, your readers, on our toes. You make us think, you make us smile and you lead us down byways we might never travel. Thank you.

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  18. I made the mistake of writing a post one time about two friends of mine, who are completely different, and how they found each other and love. I will never do it again. I ended up deleting the post because every time we have dinner together he reminds me that the evening is off limits to my blog. No matter that it was written two years ago and has been deleted for months and didn't really name him or her. Nor do I ever write about them in any other way. Some people do not want to be blogged about - no matter how positive the post. I also don't talk much about my family - you never know who is reading your blog and for what reason. Take the case of Living Life - My Way - Jeff has a stalker. Anyway, I think for me it's best to either use myself as an example of what I'm talking about, or talk about other things. I'm probably one of those you've moved on from ...

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  19. Friko I know exactly what you're saying. I don't let on to anyone around here that I blog! God forbid it! But visiting blog land is a bit like going on holiday and meeting all sorts of interesting people. I can only think of two local journals - one Shropshire and one Powys. Does this mean I'll have to buy the two?

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  20. /the past is different/
    you can't hurt the feelings
    of the dead/...what a
    declaration, dear lady;
    I love it. Your pangs and
    woes on being exposed in
    Valley's End as one of those
    damned "bloggers", hopefully,
    will not bring you unpleasantness.
    I have been blogging for a couple
    of years now; more so presently
    now that I am a colonel in the
    army of the retired (10,000
    boomers a day joining me).
    But since most of what I blog
    are comments on other people's
    sites, leaving my site for my
    poetry, essays, reviews, and
    occasional rants, I guess I dodged
    the bullet. My family. at least my
    three daughters use Facebook as
    their blog, and could care less
    what an old foggie such as I had
    to say about anything. Sort of
    reminds me of that gal who wrote
    PEYTON PLACE back in the 50's,
    Grace M something; whole town
    turned against her, sued her, and
    she made a bundle on their
    stupidity and egos. Her quote,
    "F--- them if they can't take a
    joke!" I know, much too crass for
    a lady blogger such as yourself,
    but writers, poets, bloggers, much
    of the time are reporters, and even
    if the "news" is distressing, it still
    needs to be brought to light.

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  21. Well, I'm another of those very open people. My blog was started to showcase the book I'm writing and to get some feedback. As I only had 6 followers to begin with, my husband and five longtime friends, my book wasn't getting much exposure.
    At about the time I hit a bad case of writer's block and some physical illness, I began posting to photo memes and writing memes, and those are opening up my creativity again, so I can see myself getting back to my book chapters.
    Meanwhile, Twitterfeed tells Facebook every time I post something to my blog, and Facebook puts it on my page and on my dog's page. So all of my friends and most of my relatives know about my blog, and are welcome to read it at any time. Most of them don't.
    Nevertheless, I am very much "out there" with my blog, inviting friends and relations to read it, and not feeling rejected when they don't.
    Occasionally I will mention one of my brothers, but when I use photos of the younger generations, I make sure their faces are hidden or, as in a recent post, masked. I never identify the little ones by name, only as "grandniece" or "grandnephew".
    As for saying things about people, my husband knew from the start he would be the fall guy in my book, and hence in my blog, but most of the time I only say nice things about him.
    This whole blogging thing is so new to me, it is hard to know the etiquette of it, but I do know I enjoy it.
    And I very much enjoy reading what you write, Friko.
    -- K
    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

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  22. Wonderful blog Friko. You raise all the same concerns I have had from time to time. Fortunately for me, I am not a social creature, so there are few people in my world I can insult these days. For years, I reviewed books for Amazon, and left traces of myself all over the place. One day one of my co-workers said, regarding Amazon reviews, "Who would write these things anyway?" "Me" I blurted out.

    I wrote under my married name then, but don't anymore. Why bother? One of the things that happens to you when you get older is that you are invisible to most people. Your family may recognize you, but so what? If they don't know you by now, they will never know you. Dianne (PS I love you too.)

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  23. Wow:
    I wear a double cloak of anonymity on my blog but have been busted a couple of times. I would drop the blog completely if I wasn't free to talk about anything and everything including my 'inner'. I heavily disguise the identities of the locals I write about.
    I might have to purge and trim depending on some new publicity and maybe grant some access to media. I still haven't made up my mind.
    Quite a dilemma for us anons out there...thanks for writing about it.
    XO
    WWW

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  24. Everyone of the above commenters has covered what I might have said. Most of the people I know don't read my blog and that's quite acceptable. Blogging satisfies me as a means of expression - I'm a good listener but neither witty nor a conversationalist. I enjoy reading you, Friko - please don't change.

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  25. Friko; You are one of my favorite bloggers,
    and indeed one of my favorite people.

    Always something with a shelf-life considerably longer than 5 minutes.

    Thanks for your dear visits to my blog too.

    That last post was about Don't Ask Don't Tell repeal in the US allowing gay men and women to serve in our military.

    Today I posted puppies!


    Ah blogging. . . .



    Aloha from Waikiki

    Comfort Spiral

    ><}}(°>


    <°)}}><

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  26. enjoying a much larger dose of you than our haiku meeting.
    delicious. savory with a dash of unabashed.
    i am more than satisfied.
    and must move on and place you on my menu.
    warmest regards....

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  27. I appreciate your problem. I tried to be anonymous, but was outed by my mother.

    I know of a novelist who solved the problem by always giving her friends a cameo, innocuous role in her novels. Then she could freely use them elsewhere, if she chose.

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  28. I started my blog becasue I like to write and make people laugh. Then I decided I liked to vent. Then I decided I just like to document things. Somewhere between the comedy, venting, and documentation I have to be careful not to offend or embarrass. I've been thinking of starting an Anonyblog, just for the sheer pleasure of saying exactly what I want. I feel so stifled!

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  29. It certainly changes things once you're not anonymous. I stopped writing about school experiences, which I think was wise, and now I just write about how to harm your closest family by putting them in cardboard boxes or in the attic. Surely no one could find this offensive?

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  30. Dear Friko,
    that is an interesting topic that you raise here. As a blogger you have - as in Facebook - the option to remain anonymous or fake a new identity or give your real name. (And photographs, too). Out of sheer curiosity I met a few FB 'friends' at a party - VERY interesting! Such a big gap between some of the pictures and real life! In a release-lecture on a Facebook-book I was quoted (my statements thrown with a beamer behind the reading author) and - well - that was strange. No harm done - just strange, because one often forgets that everything one writes is open for public - while you THINK you are writing a letter to one special person :-) I started with my website, there I write two blogs, and yes, you can find me under my real name on Facebook, too. My photos are real and new, and I am "bio": no photoshop, no botox, no lifting. Though I won't tell you my age :-) I never had a problem, but I seldom write about very personal stuff. Once when I did I was instantly shown the red card: I was allowed to let - for this time! - the photo of a then three-year old person (discretion again!) on my blog - but I had to promise: never again, and never on Facebook. I can accept that and see the good sense of it.
    One ever tells something about oneself, with intent or not, but I try to be discreet. (But I know a blogger who lost his job - through a hilariously written blog - but his/her (discretion!) chefs didn't think it that funny).
    What I always wonder at are the blogs where people a) possess at least one castle full of old antiques, or those who buy (and photograph) so much stuff that I don't know where they - stuff it. Britta

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  31. i have always used my real name...never thought otherwise...though there are times i wish some family members did not know...lol

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  32. I've never worried about what I have to say in my blog. It's primarily photography based anyway. I'll write about family things occasionally but never really feel the need to air any of the negatives. It's kind of like having company over. I'll clean up. Sure there are messes but I'd rather straighten up first. :)

    All that having been said, I love your writing voice and style. It's real and open, and I hope it speaks for a very long time to come.

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  33. My family and friends are so used to my writing about them (I did so in the local paper for 15 years) that they just wave their hands airily and say, Oh that Pauline, you have to be careful what you say around her; it'll end up on her blog! Or, they shake their heads gravely and agree I'll come to no good. Mostly I think I fall into your poets-artists-dreamers group as many of my posts are self-centered and ambiguous. Reading here is a delight so watch those toes and don't tread too close but do keep up the flow of words please :)

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  34. I try to be thoughtful about privacy when I write about family or friends. I'm sure I've probably goofed here and there, but I don't think I've exposed or offended anyone. I certainly hope not.

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  35. You set out the conundrum very well indeed. What I like best of all is the reason you indicate for thinking about this right now: "The local news and information journal who published some of my reminiscences and they are wanting a few more." May your readership continue to grow, near and far. It's tricky, but I have confidence you can navigate it with grace.

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  36. Interesting post. I got tickled that most people "see themselves as the person who is described favourably". One would hope that is true.
    Only 3 people who actually know me read my blog so I am pretty safe. Besides, usually the dolt in my posts is me and I am rather forgiving.

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  37. Well, this does sound like quite the predicament. But then, seeing as you normally tell it like it is, with a dash of spice for good measure.... I could see how some would not want to be involved in your tales. Though I don't believe I have ever heard a name or reference that would give away too much.

    Myself, though I have shared the link to my blog with several people I personally know, I don't believe hardly any of them take the time or effort to check it out. So I doubt that I would offend anyone. That and the fact that most everything on mine, as you aptly pointed out the other day, are not really based on anyone I know, but rather fictional tales that I have found within my imagination.

    You would be greatly missed if you ever gave into the lack of anonomity and stopped posting your wonderful true to life posts. I, for one, hope you will be around for a long time to come here in blogland! It would be rather dull without my daily dose of Friko.

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  38. It would be unethical for a fiction writer to tell stories that betrayed intimacies regarding the people close to him. It should be no different with blogging. If I want to write about someone I know I ask their permission first and once the post is done I show it to them before publishing. It's the decent thing to do.

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  39. My goodness, you have given us something we can all relate to, without exception. Quite interesting to read the comments, I must say.
    To remain truly anonymous takes a firm resolve, I think. Either you never mention it, to anyone , or if you do, you don't give out the address. Writer's egos being what they are, it's hard to keep to yourself the fact that you blog. The whole point is to be read, n'est-ce pas ?

    Even with an anonymous blog, I could not write anything mean-spirited or hurtful - partly because I have no gift for the humourous jab, and partly because I would hate to burn some bridges if that post were ever read by the wrong person. But I do like the option of being able to write less publicly, if not truly anonymously, on a second blog.
    The relationships that develop with other bloggers are of a different sort. If you reveal your previously hidden identity to someone who has read some very personal things about you, you're already an open book and have nothing to lose. The friendship has been fast-forwarded, in a sense. Whether these relationships are enduring is another story, although nothing says that 'real' friendships will endure, either. And that's enough of my late-night philosophizing!

    At any rate, I just hope I never bore you, my sardonic, sarcastic, witty friend.

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  40. Wow, didn't you open up a can!

    I always appreciate even the sometimes sting of your honesty, because I trust you.

    I'm not anonymous, I have a big family, and sometimes they read my blog. When I least expect it. So I have to keep that in mind lest I hurt anyone with telling a story. I was much more into sharing bits of my life when I first began 5 years ago. Now, I don't seem to share as much about family; the blog has gone in other directions (very eclectically). I think this is partly a result of having a lot of followers (I don't mean to brag about it); I just don't feel as inclined to share the personal stuff of life . . . though I do share feelings above anything I suppose.

    Though I don't share as much about family now, there is something very endearing about getting an email (this morning) from a dear blog friend saying how excited she is that my son Peter has a girlfriend, which I barely mentioned in a caption under a photo of said girlfriend's dog. When you know someone as long as I've known some of my blog friends, and we've shared as much as we have, there is a beautiful connection across the miles and invisibility.

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  41. I rarely write about my family except in a generic way. You never know who will read your blog and I hope I am careful with my personal comments.

    I do write about politics and have, so far, avoided trolls. That surprises me because I expected some rancor. I am quite opinionated on my blog. but my followers are kind and usually write favorable comments.

    Unless you write about the weather or other generalities you are bound to step on some toes now and then. It is a risk to be open, but I can't be otherwise.

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  42. Very interesting post Friko which raises a lot of issues. I don't write about work or family or only occasionally in very general terms and would never write about local people, Not many people know I blog which suits me fine!

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  43. It can be a fine line to walk. Extended family is mostly unaware of my blogging activities, but I'm aware that I could become known at any time. My kids and husband know that I blog but rarely read it. I *do* keep in mind that anything I put out there is associated with me forever-and-ever-Amen. So I try to be careful. There are some things that I can't blog about, because it is too revealing about someone else or because it isn't appropriate to share. I've got some things going on right now that can't be shared via the blog. On the other hand, I've made such wonderful friends while blogging that I can e-mail those friends and share those things.

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  44. I know my family read my blog and that's fine. It does mean that I am careful. I am not someone who discloses a lot of intimate thoughts in person, neither do I do that on my blog. I like to write, I try to write honestly and intelligently but I am as likely to write a truly personal, confessional piece as I am to cut my own leg off so anonymity is not necessary to me.

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  45. Guess I'm me, in Blogland or out of it - and if people object, they can like it or lump it! Tough titty! :)

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  46. There’s a lot of comments on this one. Because I started my blog as recollections for my grandchildren I have to talk about my past which includes my family, work, etc., but also my travels. Many people know about my blog, family, friends and ex co-workers. Now though I am writing more about my travels to help my husband to remember them. I think many of these people read my blog but don’t comment in it (I get a lot of page views – my little counter says 80,000 or so which is hard to believe.) I asked one family member if he ever read my blog and he replied “your blog is so dull, I’d rather watch commercials on TV.”

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  47. Oh, I don't think I want too many family members reading my blog. My side of the family is mostly computer illiterate, so no worries. John's side drops by once in awhile though, so just to make things easier for everyone I don't talk about family very much. Too bad. There is such a wealth of material there! I don't talk about my blog at work at all because, having written about my workplace, I could actually get in trouble. That's one good thing about being close to retirement, though; who cares if somebody there gets bent out of shape?

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  48. I've gone back and forth on this , as most bloggers do I suppose.

    I have friends and family that read ( although they never comment ) , and I always think in terms of my husband's professional life and my children's up and coming ones.

    I tend to write a little slant for the most part , and while it may seem that I am a bit of a fence sitter, I am in truth a what do I know person. Because I believe in grace . Have needed it myself.

    That's why I'm a little uncomfortable reading someone's account of a stranger that irked them, that sat next to them on the bus perhaps and inspired a nice little vent or rant . Because what if through the mysteries of connection you find out that person is a friend of a friend. Or a hurting soul that could have used a smile instead of a blog post about my self righteousness.

    Anyway , like I said. I am still learning and muddling along.

    ( and speaking of learning, I added you to my blogroll. so that I won't go so long before coming by.... life is so crazy here lately, so crazy )

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Comments are good, I like to know what you think of my posts. I know you'll keep it civil.